Being in a relationship that endures is something many people aspire to – the romantic ideal of having someone to accompany you through life’s countless ups and downs. And research shows there are very real benefits to being in a successful long-term relationship: couples who stay together are healthier, wealthier, happier, having more sex and living longer than their solo peers.

Despite this, most romantic relationships fall apart: whether you’re Bill and Melinda or Kim and Kanye, having a relationship that lasts seems to be one of life’s toughest tests.

Falling in love with someone is the easy part. You're naturally more excited about being with someone when things are shiny and new. But when the honeymoon period fades and you've settled into a more comfortable state, that's where the challenge arises.

“Couples tend to take on more responsibilities as years go on,” says Marina Rosenthal, PhD, a clinical psychologist in Minneapolis. “So, in addition to being lovers and romantic partners, they need to serve as a unified financial team, parents, caregivers of elderly relatives, and so on.These roles generally don’t fuel romance, though they can create a sense of intimacy and trust,” she says.

So here are some things couples who stay deeply in love do more often than couples whose feelings eventually fade, according to experts.

1. Continue dating

Even if you’re an established couple, try to pencil in date night. Dress up. Reservations. Intimate eye contact with sly footsie under the table—the whole 9 yards. If going out is not an option right now, consider cooking an intimate dinner at home and creating a restaurant ambiance with candlelight and soft music. “Many couples spend a lot of their time together trying to make decisions and solve problems, so try to plan some dates where you will definitely not solve or decide anything,” says Rosenthal. “Instead, share what you’re thinking and feeling about different aspects of your lives.”

2. Show Appreciation For Each Other

Couples who manage to stay deeply in love know that the grass isn't always greener. "While it may be tempting to explore a new, exciting, attractive, and interesting person, couples who stay in love know that people come with their own set of flaws," divorce lawyer Joryn Jenkins, tells Bustle. They're happy with the ones they have and actively work together to remember why they chose each other in the first place. They're appreciative of their partner and show it. "If you're married, remember that you vowed to be together 'for better, for worse,'" Jenkins says. "Sometimes, it’s a 'for worse' period. But, this too shall pass. The good times will return if you weather the storm together and don’t jump ship."

3. Have Lives Of Their Own

Couples that stay deeply in love know when to spend time apart. "If you are deeply in love you are able to see the clear boundary between a healthy relationship and one that is not," Ponaman says. "You support the relationship by allowing yourself and your partner to have time alone because you understand that having that independence brings you back to the relationship in a well-balanced mindset." Having a balanced mindset is essential to relationships that thrive. "This can only be achieved by working on your self-independently of anyone and anything," she says.

4. Travel

Consider creating a sense of adventure and excitement in your relationship by visiting new places together, says Rabbi Shlomo Slatkin, a licensed clinical professional counselor and co-founder of The Marriage Restoration Project. “Traveling is a great way to recharge your relationship,” he says. “Besides providing much-needed time away, it returns you refreshed, invigorated, and hopeful that you can establish new patterns to avoid getting sucked back into the humdrum of everyday living. “You need not travel across the ocean,” he adds. “Even a short overnight trip can do the job.”

5. Keep It Light And Playful

Relationships don't always have to be super serious. Couples who stay deeply in love know how to push each other‘s buttons in a healthy way. They tell jokes, tease each other, and get the inside scoop on each others lives. They like staying "in the know" and connected. "If you can be lighthearted just as easily as you can be open and vulnerable about the deep things then you know you have a solid foundation for a relationship thrive," Ponaman says.